semi-optimist.

Saturday, January 06, 2007

i guess today didnt turn out well for me.. everything was out of place.. just cos im sick.. i had a hell of a moodswing and it wrecked and ruined the whole day.. migraine.. now plus flu.. i hate myself for this wreck.

baby.. am sorry for what happened today.. i didnt mean it.. am sorry.. so sorry...

i love u so much.. =(.. <3..

---wrecked @ 1/06/2007 11:22:00 PM---

people say blogging is like diaries and in diaries, people write bout how their days went. but i dunno why, i dun. haha.

people say that only girls have mood swings due to PMS. well.. i think i dun agree with it.. im having mood swings too.. i dun understand myself sometimes, but hell, thats what im going through. sigh..

baby.. im sorry for the bad mood face just now.. im really sorry.. i didnt mean it.. i just feel guilty.. i felt that i didnt spend much time with u. im just not satisfied with myself.. i love u so much.. i had mood swing just now actually.. sigh.. nvm..

today went out with baby.. just hang around bishan.. chill around and talk things out bout yesterday's quarrel.. im sorry for what happened.. i love you... end.

---wrecked @ 1/06/2007 08:03:00 PM---

i feel so hopeless. i feel so useless. i felt like i dun have a family. i felt like i lost my directions.. no where to turn to.. i lost my sense of belonging to my family.. ever since the day i had verbal wars with my dad.. who was more than willing to curse his own son.. hate his own son. i felt as though i lost a family..

sometimes.. i felt that i got no where to turn to.. i feel so hopeless.. i feel so useless.. didnt talk to him for 4 days.. i felt that im just a nobody now. my migraine is killing me now. i hate migraine..

im just sick. sick of myself. sick of myself.. i just feel all alone..

end.

---wrecked @ 1/06/2007 12:23:00 AM---

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

dad, you cursed me like there's no tomorrow. how wonderful was that. i didnt expect u to be so mean.. why cant u do like what u say? "be patient if your mum keeps nagging bout the past". i did. but why didnt you do as what u preached. u cursed me that will die and suffer bad things. fine. what the fuck am i to you? a scumbag for u to curse at? u aint a dad. u sound morel ike an animal. i'll never ever forgive u. u want me to die? take a knife, a parang, go ahead and slice me. cut my head off. kill me if u think u'll be happy without me alive. but remember, u'll never be safe until u die. i will never forgive you for this. never. ever. you made me hate u. u r the meanest and most evil dad i've ever met. my respect for u has vanished to thin air. i know i'm just a sucka to u. curse me all u want. i live on not with ur guidance. i will succeed without ur guidance. but with my hatred towards u.

dad, as long as i'm not okay, as long as my anger is still burning, u're never forgiven. NEVER! end.

---wrecked @ 1/02/2007 09:21:00 PM---

to the one that i call lover,

i miss your smile, i miss your laughter, i miss every single part of you. from the start until now, i know, 15 is your favourite number in mind, cos its our anniversary on the 15th. you're just so sweet and cute. nobody who had came to my life had ever made me feel this way. this is not a song. but this is a note to you. not a bad one. but a good one, to tell you how much i love you and how much i miss you. NOTE TO SELF: I MISS YOU TERRIBLY.

you mean a lot to me. please, dont ever leave me, cos i LOVE you till the end. you're my last.

nobody is as special as you are to me. end.

---wrecked @ 1/02/2007 02:23:00 AM---

Monday, January 01, 2007

hello. happy new year everyone. haha. went to city hall to find cheap black bermudas. just went to look around. after that went to town to look around for shoes. yea. i'm deciding on vans high cut with skulls on it. very nice la. haha.

new year comes with new hopes as what people say. i just hope to complete my poly life without repeating and i just hope after NS, i wanna work hard for money and be with my love forever. i just hope it comes true.

baby, remember what i say yesterday. always keep that in mind. "MY FINAL STATEMENT: YOU ARE MY LAST." end.

---wrecked @ 1/01/2007 11:07:00 PM---

Sunday, December 31, 2006

hello. ok. today was boring in a way. slacked at home. but the thing i enjoyed was.. i miss her so much. hehe. ok.

anyways.. i had a haircut on friday. i know my hair looks irritatingly ugly. haha. look at my friendster(i think) to see my new hair. if not on friendster, then go to my myspace.

girls, u always think that all the guys are the same. i totally disagree. not all the guys are the same. baby, i really hope u understand what i mean. i'll prove to u that i'm not like those typical girls who wreck girls' heart. i'll show u how much i love u. not only for now. but forever. i love u. i really do.

till then.. end.

---wrecked @ 12/31/2006 10:42:00 PM---

hello. today is hari raya haji. tomorrow is new year. people going countdown and all. ok. good for them. me going countdown? NOT! stay home, do something better. haha. skool reopening soon. results? ah damn! dont mention it cos it'll be a horror wreck. what ever u might call.

anyways, yesterday went to nee soon east cc to watch mosh compete. ok.. they didnt win. we expected the winner to be a chinese group. and well.. it turned out right. its not supposed to be good actually. but well, who cares.

i bought emoPUFF a tank top she wanted for all this while, plus a stud belt. HAHA. and i want a VANS high cut with skull imprints on it. yea!! 59 BUCKS FOR GOD'S SAKE! ok. stop exaggerating.

baby.. i miss you soo.. too much. end.

---wrecked @ 12/31/2006 08:55:00 AM---

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